The 5-MeO-DMT, Bufo experience. The dissolution of the ego, the ultimate surrender.
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The 5-MeO-DMT, Bufo experience = the dissolution of the ego, the ultimate surrender. As I take a long exhale, I dive into the unknown where a bright yellow and orange light engulfed me. Initially, I feel the resistance to let go, to hang on to reality...to fight it and ride out the wave but the pull to surrender is strong, so I had no other choice but to surrender.
The image below is as close as I can picture of what I saw in my journey. I don't remember much of it but seeing flashes of my childhood as I ( was it my body, my mind, my soul or my whole being?) dissolved into nothingness and became part of everything at the same time. I have experienced this part the last time I did Bufo. To me, it's a validation of the interconnectedness of everything surrounding me, here and everywhere, being and non-being. There is zero doubt!
I came back out of it wishing that I could've remember more of my childhood; that I could've "seen" what happened then so I could understand it, make peace or amends. I acknowledge my resistance as my own self protection mode to avoid being hurt. As I continue to integrate this experience, I come to accept that I don't have to know the details of what happened. All that was asked from me was to surrender and that I did. Not to surrender to the power of the medicine but to let go of the chains that are holding me back and surrender to the resistance that I created in the story of my life.
That's the continuation of the work with myself. To get out of my way and stop self sabotaging. I have a roadmap to follow. Healing is happening!🙏
The image below is as close as I can picture of what I saw in my journey. I don't remember much of it but seeing flashes of my childhood as I ( was it my body, my mind, my soul or my whole being?) dissolved into nothingness and became part of everything at the same time. I have experienced this part the last time I did Bufo. To me, it's a validation of the interconnectedness of everything surrounding me, here and everywhere, being and non-being. There is zero doubt!
I came back out of it wishing that I could've remember more of my childhood; that I could've "seen" what happened then so I could understand it, make peace or amends. I acknowledge my resistance as my own self protection mode to avoid being hurt. As I continue to integrate this experience, I come to accept that I don't have to know the details of what happened. All that was asked from me was to surrender and that I did. Not to surrender to the power of the medicine but to let go of the chains that are holding me back and surrender to the resistance that I created in the story of my life.
That's the continuation of the work with myself. To get out of my way and stop self sabotaging. I have a roadmap to follow. Healing is happening!🙏